Time for some more musings on America. We left it last time with
our arrival in Orlando. And according to my hand written notes, ”I have now
totally lost track of the date and time! With no idea where we are or where
have been!”
Clearly this is a misnomer, as I know full well that we are now in
Orlando, as we have to go out for the Arabian Nights show that we booked
earlier in the week.
Before then, I need to fill in some detail and re-tell a tale of
damp towels and raised eye brows!
Orlando obviously means a trip to a theme park or two and as we
had booked tickets for the Universal Orlando Resort theme parks, before we left
the UK, we needed to arrange transport to get there from our hotel. (This was
for the next day).
We had discussed the issue with Suzanne, who had suggested one
firm, that had a booking desk in the hotel reception, or the hotel itself
provided a limited shuttle service, each costing various amounts.
There seemed to be reluctance on Suzanne’s part to be helpful,
whether that was because we hadn’t booked trips via her and lost her some
commission, or she was just not bothered at that point in time, we were not
sure, but we thought, heck just go to reception and ask, what’s the worst that
can happen?
So, we asked the nice lady at reception. And here is another prime
example of what I love about America, she was friendly, chatty, charming and
had a genuine concern to help us out. She said we could use the firm here who
provide a great service, but can be pricey. You could use the hotel shuttle,
it’s cheaper, doesn’t run regularly and the drop off points are not that good.
She noted that we booked through Virgin, and said; “why not ask
the Universal Studios rep?” and she indicated a vacant desk next to reception.
“They will take you from door to door, with regular pickups and as you booked
through Virgin, it will cost you nothing.”
“Nothing?” was the chorused response.
“Yea, sure. Just pop back first thing tomorrow, when the rep. is
back and book, couldn’t be easier, have a nice day”
So that’s what we did.
Anyway, back to the Arabian Nights trip. As I say, we arrived at
the hotel at 5:30pm, sorted out our transport for the next day and got showered
and changed, in double quick time, as all those who had booked for the Arabian
Nights show, needed to be on the coach by 7pm for the drive up to Kissimmee.
So, 7pm comes around and everybody has had a quick wash and brush up, and popped on their best going out gear. We board the coach, the air full of
Brut 33, Charlie and Tesco Value Antiperspirant.
Suzanne carries out the
obligatory head count.
“Mmmmm. Vee are zee vun short”
She counts again, just to be sure. And double checks the list.
“ Ya, vee are zee vun short!”
“It’s that trouble maker Meez Daizy!”
You may recall Miss Daisy, her of the eye brows?
Anyway, time is getting on. Ernie pulls the coach out of the
parking lot and round to the front of the hotel, near reception. Suzanne jumps
off and runs (waddles) into reception to check to see if our stray member is
waiting there.
A few minutes pass and Suzanne reappears, shaking her head, boards
the bus and shouts; “Drive on Ernie!”
As we pull out of the hotel, a lone wet and bedraggled figure
appears from reception, wrapped in towels, hair wet and dishevelled with
blurred eye brows, in a state of shock and / or surprise.
Miss Daisy clearly thought she had time for a quick swim. She was
wrong. We drive off and Miss Daisy goes to dry off.
Anyway, I know you have been asking, what is this Arabian Nights
show all about? Well, you may ask, I have no idea. Something to do with horses,
but the main point is, it comes with dinner and unlimited drinks!
“Alcoholic?”
Yes Dave, alcoholic.
“Get in!”
It actually transpires that the show is a rather cheesy Disney
style panto on horseback. Following an Arabian story, of Princesses and Princes
and horses and baddies and goodies and fluffy teddies and fairies and pwetty
little flopsy wopsy bunnies and things……….
Sorry drifted off then!
It was pretty dire. The horses were good. The unlimited drinks
were better.
The choice of food wasn’t great. The mashed potato was clearly
microwaved. The vegetables were OK. And the steak was a little dry. Probably
a disappointing participant from last nights’ show!
Top of the bill tonight, top of the menu tomorrow!
The best part really was being out with all the gang from the bus,
in our own box, with waiter service, topping up your glass at every
opportunity. Very posh it was. And a good laugh.
After the obligatory “exit through gift shop” it was all back on
the bus, for the journey back to the hotel. I don’t recall much of the journey
back, clearly too much of the California Blush rosé wine!!
We awake the next morning early, no wakeup call today, but we need
to book the shuttle bus and take full advantage of the free breakfast, and get
going to theme parks!
The shuttle picked us up right outside the hotel and dropped us
right outside the theme park, a short walk, well glide, down the moving
pavement and we were there. A quick debate with the ticket office, as we only
had a receipt and had to exchange this for tickets. We should also have had an
early pass, to get in before the crowds, but it wasn’t on the receipt, so we
had to join the queue. Heyho.
We had a two park ticket, first we went into Islands of Adventure
and if we had time it was just next door to Universal Studios.
This was really Little Miss Dave’s day, as she was desperate to get to The
Wizarding World of Harry Potter, so that was the first port of call.
And it was well worth the wait, judging by our first sight of it.
The way they have recreated Hogsmeade and Hogwarts is magnificent. The
attention to detail is brilliant and it does feel you are walking around in
Harry’s world, if you ignore the thousands upon thousands of other tourists
doing exactly the same thing!
Although the scenery and recreation of Hogwarts is totally
brilliant, there are only three rides. One mini roller coaster; “The Flight of
the Hippogriff”. Which is a safe bet; even I don’t mind going on one like that.
One massive roller coaster, called the “Dragon Challenge”, which
is actually two rides in one and goes upside down and round and round and….
“You can forget that! You’ll never get me on that thing!”
And finally, there’s “Harry Potter and the Forbidden Journey”,
which is walking through Hogwarts and ending up on a ride, which is part real
and part simulation. And a very real queue of 90 minutes to get on!
Which is what we did, we queued and queued and queued, until we
got inside, which wasn’t even the start of the ride! It was just the section
where you have to pop your belongings into a locker, but it was bedlam! There
were would-be wizards all over the place, with people actually joining the
queue by entering through the gift shop!!
Noooo! Get it right! It’s EXIT through gift shop!
This was all too much for Mrs Dave to bear and she did a runner with
all our bags, saying it was stupid and badly organised! Stopping only to punch
the nearest attendant in the face!
Fair enough, Little Miss Dave and I carried on queuing, for another 40
minutes!!
Was it worth it? Well, I thought so; it was a fantastically put
together ride, mixing simulation with live action. Little Miss Dave wasn't so sure.
Still she managed to get to Hogwarts, after years of nagging.
Have I mentioned that it was hot in Orlando?
It was hot in Orlando. So we made sure we kept drinking, which
reminds me, Little Miss Dave got herself a Butterbeer before we got on the ride. It was
a rather bizarre concoction, laden with sugar and E numbers; still it kept the
kids happy and active!
From the slightly disappointing Wizarding World of Harry Potter,
we ventured into the next zone, which was the Toon Lagoon which contained
cartoon themed rides.
By this time we were so hot we headed for a water ride,
in the hope that it would be a chance to cool off, a little splash of water
here or there. We queued for the Popeye & Bluto's Bilge-Rat Barges ride.
A
circular boat that travelled gently around the flowing waters, with the
occasional splash maybe.
Who am I kidding? We got absolutely drenched! Head to toe soaked!
However, it did the trick and the hot and flustered, were now cool
and damp, if somewhat bedraggled.
After a quick stop for a munch on a huge turkey leg, we were off
again. The next stop was the Jurassic Park River Adventure. Now this was a huge
boat that drifted off around Jurassic Park, recreating the film, which was
really well done. Then your boat heads into a large warehouse affair and sirens
start wailing, lights start flashing and the boat starts going uphill, slowly
and surely, in the dark.
Going uphill, a long way uphill, can mean only one thing! At some
point, it’s going to come down!
The boat levelled out, a huge dinosaur appeared from nowhere, and roared
as we disappeared down a very steep watery hill, splashing out into bright
sunshine, with plumes of water flying all over the place. Soaked again.
We continued around Islands of Adventure, soaking in the
atmosphere (do you get it? Soaking? Oh please yourself!)
We next headed out of the park and into Universal Studios, to see
what rides we could go on. Well, there was no queue for Woody Woodpecker's
Nuthouse Coaster, so we got straight on, laughed so much as we whizzed around
this little family coaster, that we jumped off at the end and went straight
back to the start to do it again!
Brilliant!
We went on the ET Adventure, this must have been mind blowing in
the 80’s. 30 years on, it’s not so good.
We also queued for The Simpsons ride, which was a simulator, so Mrs Dave dropped out again and decided to trawl the gift shops. Whilst queuing for
the Simpsons ride, the weather turned and a storm blew up from nowhere. Wind,
thunder, lightning and rain, lots of rain. Still Little Miss Dave and I, were
undercover, so we were OK. The Simpsons ride was brilliant!
After the ride, we tried to make our way out of the park, dashing
between shops and shelters, trying not to get soaked for a third time that day.
We eventually got near to the park exit and the Hard Rock Café,
where we thought we would eat before catching the shuttle back to the hotel.
Once inside, we were ushered through to the restaurant, not before
we were lined up against a wall, handed a guitar and told to smile. Several
flash bulbs went off in our face and we thought, that’ll be another $25 photo
being offered to us later!
Well, after two soakings and running around a theme park, through
a storm, the outcome of the photo was truly awful.
Still the food was brilliant
and the atmosphere in the Hard Rock Café is something to experience.
We shuttled our way back to the hotel, arriving back at about 8pm.
I went straight to the room and hit the shower.
Mrs Dave and Little Miss Dave popped into the hotel gift shop for 5 minutes, so
I was told. Eventually they turned up about an hour and a half later, after
visiting 2 or 3 gift shops and trying to spot alligators in the crazy golf
course. You had to be there.
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